Quick Answer:
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious, or regretful after getting a puppy, you’re not failing — you’re likely experiencing the puppy blues. This usually means your puppy (and you) need more structure, predictability, and support, not more patience or positivity. A clear schedule, realistic expectations, and a training plan can dramatically improve how you feel.
The Puppy Academy students, Bunny & Perry!
If you’ve ever thought:
“Did I make a mistake?”
“Why is this so much harder than I expected?”
“I love my puppy, but I’m miserable right now”
You’re not alone — and you’re not a bad puppy parent.
The puppy blues are incredibly common, especially in the first few weeks and months of puppyhood.
What Are the Puppy Blues?
The puppy blues are a mix of emotional and physical stress that can show up after bringing a puppy home. They often include:
Feeling overwhelmed or anxious
Loss of sleep and mental exhaustion
Regret, guilt, or second‑guessing the decision
Feeling disconnected from your puppy
Crying, irritability, or constant frustration
This doesn’t mean you don’t love your puppy. It means your nervous system is overloaded.
Why the Puppy Blues Happen
In our experience, puppy blues usually come from a lack of structure, not a lack of love.
Common causes include:
No predictable daily schedule
Too much freedom, too soon
Inconsistent rules and boundaries
Training programs that are too vague or too “soft” for your puppy’s needs
Trying to manage everything on your own
When puppies don’t have structure, they feel unsure — and when you don’t have structure, everything feels harder.
Signs Your Puppy Needs More Structure
If you’re experiencing the puppy blues, you may also notice that your puppy:
Struggles to settle or relax
Nips, bites, or jumps constantly
Seems “wired” or overstimulated
Ignores cues unless food is directly in front of them
Has accidents or forgets training
These behaviors don’t mean your puppy is stubborn or difficult. They usually mean your puppy doesn’t yet understand what’s expected.
How Structure Helps (Both of You)
Structure gives puppies:
Predictability
Clear expectations
Confidence
The ability to relax
And structure gives puppy parents:
Relief
A sense of control
Fewer emotional swings
Clear next steps
This is why so many puppy parents feel immediate relief once they get on a schedule or training plan.
Practical Steps to Ease the Puppy Blues
Here are a few changes that often help quickly:
1. Get on a Daily Schedule
A consistent routine for:
Potty breaks
Meals
Training
Play
Rest
…can dramatically reduce stress for both you and your puppy.
2. Reduce Freedom
More freedom doesn’t equal happiness for puppies.
Use:
Crate time
Puppy‑proofed areas
Leashes indoors if needed
Freedom is earned as your puppy learns.
3. Lower Your Expectations
Puppies are babies.
Regression, accidents, and inconsistency are normal — especially during developmental stages.
4. Get Support ASAP
Whether it’s an in‑person trainer, an online program, or a community of puppy parents — you shouldn’t have to do this alone.
Support shortens the hard phase.
When to Reach Out for Extra Help
If your puppy blues feel intense, constant, or overwhelming — especially if they’re affecting your sleep, mood, or relationships — it’s important to ask for help.
Oftentimes that means:
A structured training program
Professional guidance
Or simply reassurance that what you’re experiencing is normal
This Phase Will Pass
Puppyhood is a season — not a permanent state.
With structure, consistency, and support, most puppy parents move from overwhelmed to confident much faster than they expect.
You’re not behind. You’re learning.
Want Support Through Puppyhood?
Our Online Puppy School provides step‑by‑step guidance, structure, and weekly live Q&A support so you don’t have to figure this out on your own.
You deserve support too — not just your puppy.
This question originally came up on our Ask A Puppy Trainer podcast, where our trainers discuss age-specific puppy behavior in more depth. You can listen to the full episode here → on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify.
Have more questions about your puppy? Ask our trainers LIVE every Wednesday at 1 pm PT on our Instagram @thepuppyacademy during our Ask A Puppy Trainer Show! All replays are posted afterward, and you can catch up on our last ones on our YouTube channel or Podcast.
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This article is part of our Puppy Behavior Basics series.
Related Puppy Training Help
If you’re navigating the puppy blues, these resources may also help:
