What to Do When You’re Experiencing the Puppy Blues

Quick Answer:

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious, or regretful after getting a puppy, you’re not failing — you’re likely experiencing the puppy blues. This usually means your puppy (and you) need more structure, predictability, and support, not more patience or positivity. A clear schedule, realistic expectations, and a training plan can dramatically improve how you feel.

puppy blues training

The Puppy Academy students, Bunny & Perry!

If you’ve ever thought:

  • “Did I make a mistake?”

  • “Why is this so much harder than I expected?”

  • “I love my puppy, but I’m miserable right now”

You’re not alone — and you’re not a bad puppy parent.

The puppy blues are incredibly common, especially in the first few weeks and months of puppyhood.

What Are the Puppy Blues?

The puppy blues are a mix of emotional and physical stress that can show up after bringing a puppy home. They often include:

  • Feeling overwhelmed or anxious

  • Loss of sleep and mental exhaustion

  • Regret, guilt, or second‑guessing the decision

  • Feeling disconnected from your puppy

  • Crying, irritability, or constant frustration

This doesn’t mean you don’t love your puppy. It means your nervous system is overloaded.

Why the Puppy Blues Happen

In our experience, puppy blues usually come from a lack of structure, not a lack of love.

Common causes include:

  • No predictable daily schedule

  • Too much freedom, too soon

  • Inconsistent rules and boundaries

  • Training programs that are too vague or too “soft” for your puppy’s needs

  • Trying to manage everything on your own

When puppies don’t have structure, they feel unsure — and when you don’t have structure, everything feels harder.

Signs Your Puppy Needs More Structure

If you’re experiencing the puppy blues, you may also notice that your puppy:

  • Struggles to settle or relax

  • Nips, bites, or jumps constantly

  • Seems “wired” or overstimulated

  • Ignores cues unless food is directly in front of them

  • Has accidents or forgets training

These behaviors don’t mean your puppy is stubborn or difficult. They usually mean your puppy doesn’t yet understand what’s expected.

How Structure Helps (Both of You)

Structure gives puppies:

  • Predictability

  • Clear expectations

  • Confidence

  • The ability to relax

And structure gives puppy parents:

  • Relief

  • A sense of control

  • Fewer emotional swings

  • Clear next steps

This is why so many puppy parents feel immediate relief once they get on a schedule or training plan.

Practical Steps to Ease the Puppy Blues

Here are a few changes that often help quickly:

1. Get on a Daily Schedule

A consistent routine for:

  • Potty breaks

  • Meals

  • Training

  • Play

  • Rest

…can dramatically reduce stress for both you and your puppy.

2. Reduce Freedom

More freedom doesn’t equal happiness for puppies.

Use:

  • Crate time

  • Puppy‑proofed areas

  • Leashes indoors if needed

Freedom is earned as your puppy learns.

3. Lower Your Expectations

Puppies are babies.

Regression, accidents, and inconsistency are normal — especially during developmental stages.

4. Get Support ASAP

Whether it’s an in‑person trainer, an online program, or a community of puppy parents — you shouldn’t have to do this alone.

Support shortens the hard phase.

When to Reach Out for Extra Help

If your puppy blues feel intense, constant, or overwhelming — especially if they’re affecting your sleep, mood, or relationships — it’s important to ask for help.

Oftentimes that means:

  • A structured training program

  • Professional guidance

  • Or simply reassurance that what you’re experiencing is normal

This Phase Will Pass

Puppyhood is a season — not a permanent state.

With structure, consistency, and support, most puppy parents move from overwhelmed to confident much faster than they expect.

You’re not behind. You’re learning.

Want Support Through Puppyhood?

Our Online Puppy School provides step‑by‑step guidance, structure, and weekly live Q&A support so you don’t have to figure this out on your own.

You deserve support too — not just your puppy.

This question originally came up on our Ask A Puppy Trainer podcast, where our trainers discuss age-specific puppy behavior in more depth. You can listen to the full episode here → on Apple Podcasts or on Spotify.

Have more questions about your puppy? Ask our trainers LIVE every Wednesday at 1 pm PT on our Instagram @thepuppyacademy during our Ask A Puppy Trainer Show! All replays are posted afterward, and you can catch up on our last ones on our YouTube channel or Podcast.

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This article is part of our Puppy Behavior Basics series.

Related Puppy Training Help

If you’re navigating the puppy blues, these resources may also help: